Abby’s Boyfriend
Though there’s a chance that he’s gay and/or a paid actor, we’re down for an episode where we get to know the fake man living in Los Angeles who Abby identifies as her secret boyfriend. After all, shouldn’t America have a chance to weigh in on whether or not he needs to give her a ring? And if he is real, it would definitely make Abby’s personal life seem less sad.

Read more: Dance Moms: Who Deserves More Screen Time?

Vivi-Anne
Now that Candy Apple’s Dance [sic] elite crew is all-male, we’ve been seriously deprived of awkward numbers that use Cathy’s daughter as a human prop — not only was it hilarious to see how Vivi was going to be shoehorned in to every dance while not dancing, but the little girl also gave some brilliant THs about how much she disliked her mother, dancing and basically everything that wasn’t related to eating. An episode where cameras followed her around all day would without a doubt be spectacular.

Read more: Dance Moms: Who Deserves More Screen Time?

Same Ol’ Rivalries
I think we’ve finally exhausted all of the feuding the current ALDC women could possibly have. It’s been a long season of veteran mom vs. veteran mom, veteran mom vs. new mom, everyone vs. Abby and Abby vs. Cathy — and that doesn’t even cover the same Chloe/Maddie rivalry the producers have created for us. Can we please get some fresh blood in here? I don’t mean a new mom, either, as we saw that this season with Nicaya and her mom and their short-lived time on the show. The energy needs to be taken from Abby and the O.G. moms and put into, say, a rival dance company that doesn’t involve Cathy. Much as I love her crazy ways, her time in the “Nationals 90210” was too over-the-top and vicious to the degree of not being fun anymore. Given that so many people seem to have it out for Abby, maybe we can meet those studios — it allows for all new kinds of characters, and will prevent too many recycled storylines about who hates who this week.

Read more: Dance Moms: Why We’re Putting Season 3 on Probation

WTF, Dance Moms?

Today in 2012 Tubey Award voting: Best Musical Moment on a Reality Show, which frankly is like trying to decide between children for me. The nominees:

• Cathy choreographs a dance for just the moms, giving herself a ridiculous solo (Dance Moms)
• Colton Dixon’s “Love the Way You Lie” (American Idol)
• Dida Ritz’s lipsync to “(This Will Be) An Everlasting Love” in front of Natalie Cole (RuPaul’s Drag Race)
• Gladys Knight sings on the finale (Dancing with the Stars)
• Jessica Sanchez’s “I Will Always Love You” (American Idol)
• Latrice Royale singing “Natural Woman” to her baby bump (RuPaul’s Drag Race)
• Lisa’s “Like Whoa” music video (America’s Next Top Model)
• Matheus’ “Gives You Hell” (The Glee Project)
• Tony Lucca’s “Baby One More Time…” (The Voice)
• Twitch & Sasha’s breakfast routine (So You Think You Can Dance)

Who will you be voting for?