Chuck Bass finally won back his hotel, but seriously regressed in the process as he had to backstab literally everyone he ever knew in order to do so. When he realized that Blair wasn’t just taking “a weekend trip” to Paris — and that she really left him for his best friend — he went a tad bit Howard Hughes and locked himself in the Empire for years, living off of hotel mints and the occasional bagel from room service. He is presumed dead, but sometimes, in the middle of night in the city, people claim to hear a man scream “I am CHUCK BASS!”
Today in 2012 Tubey Awards voting: Best Badass. Which of these men, women and children do you most enjoy seeing kick ass and take names?
Nothing is true and everything is up for grabs and the shippers are melting down and the whole thing is just a glorious trainwreck on fire. I haven’t been this proud since the time everybody on the show turned into Serena at the same time and she got etherized and kidnapped.
- Jacob Clifton, Gossip Girl 5-24 “Return of the Ring” Recap
Thugs in tuxes arrive, of course, to take Chuck away. He does not go gently, because I don’t know if you know this but Chuck has some abandonment stuff. Mostly it’s due to his mother dying and his father hating him and then dying and then his molester uncle kept coming back to ruin his life in creative ways and abandon him and then his mother came back to life and fucked up his life in other ways and then she wasn’t his mother and then she went to Tibet and abandoned him then his other mother fucked his best friend and then his other father was his uncle and then his first mother went back to being his mother and then his first father came back from the dead and then abandoned him. Also because of Blair probably.
- Jacob Clifton, Gossip Girl 5-23 “The Fugitives” Recap
Chuck! You are so fucking ridiculous! That’s amazing. If you had a friend like Chuck, okay, who was willing to take off from his busy schedule of raping and domestic violence so that he could pay sexy street toughs to beat him up, while quoting Hamlet, and then said some shit like that immediately afterward, what would you do? I’m honestly asking. I have no idea what I would do. None. Probably I would make out with him. But maybe like in a mean way?
- Jacob, Gossip Girl 5-2 “Beauty & The Feast” Recap